Date night and I am exhausted

I am exhausted BUT….

We have had thto exhausted fro date nightis date on the books for about a month and of course I have been exhausted and utterly worn out since noon. Why is it that when we have something planned it seems to always be on a day that fibro shows up one way or the other? I know my day was truly exhausting because my four-year-old crashed on our couch. She never just takes a nap all by herself during the day. Her spontaneous nap is how I know my exhaustion is truly justified today. None the less I still need to muster up all the energy possible and enjoy myself tonight. Dates, whether you have been together for a year or 75 years are very important. To important to reschedule.

My husband and I have always believed in the power of date nights but ever since we moved into our new home our dates have been errands or escapes from the kids. You know how that is. So tonight is very important, we have decided to treat it like a romantic date.

The day after

Our date gave us just what we were looking for. Had I decided to stay home and put my comfy clothes on, my husband and I would never have received what we needed last night. As I realize that, I wonder how many other great experiences have I taken away from my family due to Fibromyalgia. There were many times for many years that I just sat in my chair. I did not want to do anymore than I needed to do in order to get through my day. The things I once enjoyed, as with most of you with Fibromyalgia know, were lost. Learning how to live with the side effects of Fibromyalgia is hard enough. Then you add the changes you need to make on how you do things. Not just how many things you do but how you do them.


I know without those changes I would never be as happy as I am today. Those first several years were full of so much pain and lack of understanding for myself. The anger I felt towards myself when I could not do something or held the family back. I am sure many of you can understand that frustration and anger.

I was also insecure about the future of my marriage. We make vows to each other when we are married and should stand by our word, I know. The insecurity came from me feeling as if this medical problem was also effecting him more than I cared for. He married a women who could do everything she needed to and more. Someone who was generally very happy, had energy and never yelled or had PMS. Then I turned into an emotional mess, started having PMS, yelling and always full of stress. So to me he was now married to someone different than he had made those vows to years before.

So to make sure he could be happy, I did let him know, that if he could not stay happy with me because of the Fibromyalgia I understood. I have taken that choice away now though. I am proud that I married a man who fought for me. Anyway he could help he did and still does. Even when I have very emotional days and all I want to do is bite off anyone’s head. I am sure you fully understand that feeling. How about the days when you are angry one second and the next you are crying. Fun, right?

One way I take care of myself

I still feel a little guilty when my husband does the big household chores. Because I cannot do the big chores without having a flare of side effects. But then I remember it is important to make sure I am taken care of too. If me taking care of myself means someone else must mop the floors then great. I found out I have a limitation and how to take care of that limitation. I am very thankful to have someone who understands that and doesn’t give me grief over me not being able to do something.

Some thoughts for you

So many of us are women and believe we can still be Super Woman. But doing that just puts us down again. So why do we act as if we are yo-yo’s? Switching back and forth from doing nothing because we can’t due to some side effect we are dealing with. Or we are bright and cheery and full of energy. We can have more energy, a little bit more mind you and be cheery every day. The thing is we just have to choose how we use our energy.

So take everything slow, try not to stress over to much and give yourself everything you need to go out on that date. If you nurture and then harvest yourself properly you will be able to have fun memory making days. Dates. getaways, girl time, play time. Make sure to take care of yourself and your family will enjoy you a lot more. Not to mention just how much more you will enjoy and like yourself once again too.

Kindle Resources

In the mood to read?

There are several books offered on Amazon for the Kindle. The books I am talking about are also free with your Kindle membership. If you do not have an unlimited membership several books are still very affordable. If you are paying out of pocket for every book then collections are probably your best bet. I found this title Free from Fibromyalgia Books 1-5 Master Collection Kindle Edition which is by Tricia Duffy to be of interest. Tricia Duffy has written several books on Fibromyalgia for the Kindle.

If you are more interested in a personal story then I would try Pain-Free: How I Released 43 Years of Chronic Pain. This book is written by Dottie DuParcé. As far as I can see this is her only publication. But for $3.99 or free with your Kindle membership it would be great to see how someone else who has years of experience, deals with their pain.

Relationship Books

Are you looking for a free resource for your marriage on kindle this may be of interest to you. This book with a Kindle edition is called, Marriage on Mission: How strengthening your marriage multiplies your missional impact. 

Running on Empty No More: Transform Your Relationships With Your Partner, Your Parents and Your Children, this sounds like an amazing book for something that so many of us with Fibromyalgia have been dealing with.

Knowing your partners and your love language is a very important tool. Take the time to read this today. Knowing what is the best way to communicate my love to my husband has been a great tool in him always knowing how I feel about him. The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts.

Why we need each other

With something like Fibromyalgia we must never stop educating ourselves. There are not many people who what it is we actually have. We now have a name when for so long many patients did not have a correct diagnosis. My Grandmother was told her Fibromyalgia was different things over the years. The medical community did not have a name for Fibromyalgia. And yet still today many in the medical profession do not understand it. That is why it is important for us with Fibromyalgia to never stop talking to each other. Learning from one another is our most powerful tool.

Looking on the Kindle app for any personal experiences or research done by fellow Fibro patients is our most important tool. I wish doctors would see it that way too. Maybe then Fibromyalgia would no longer be such a mystery. Many of us have found out that nutrition does play a vital factor in the pain, exhaustion, and cognitive function we experience every day. Yet many doctors do not believe what patients are telling them.

Something I changed

The most I hear about nutrition from others is a diet high in plant-based food is what helps them. I chose to start my journey on the road to vegan and eventually WFPB (Whole Foods Plant Based) because of research was done by my husband and me. Once he said he would eat this way too we started our new lifestyle, gradually. Giving up certain foods like dairy was the hardest but it took me less than 6 months to do. I gave up meat first, I noticed my amount of pain was less. My cognitive function was better too.

When I took out dairy my whole life changed. My hormones became a little more balanced. My digestive system operated better. My pain, exhaustion and cognitive function all improved. I am also a more positive thinker, without trying. I smile more, without thinking about it. While I am out of the house I smile at strangers and even give compliments to those I do not know.

My next food battle is oil or salt, I have not decided yet. I will eventually reach my goal though.

Never stop trading information and seeking education about your diagnosis. You never know what will help you conquer it all.

Natural treatments that work for me

Natural Treatments, do they work?

Yes, natural treatments do work. The natural treatments that do work for me are what will be covered in this post. If I have not tried it then it is not on my list. Giving you information on what might work is not a helpful piece of information.

My ever growing list

  1. Very hot bath with Epsom salt, baking soda, and lavender essential oil. Many of you have already heard of this one. I need the water to be very hot or it does nothing to soothe my pain. For those of us with Fibromyalgia, showers can bring on nerve pain and exhaustion so a bath is best when you are having a fibro day, as I call it.
  2. Herbal tea, I like the brand Traditional Medicinals because the flavors I use are all organic and very pleasant. I use two tea bags in the teas with lighter flavor when I am having a flare-up. The use of the two tea bags is purely medicinal by adding the extra tea bag I am making my medicine strong enough to take away my pain or stress. Just in case you would not like to go through a long list of teas I do not recommend I have also added the links to the specific teas that help me.
    1. Chamomile and Lavender– I use this tea for nerve and muscle pain. When do we not have that problem? Both Chamomile and Lavender are very relaxing all around.
    2. Stress Ease– a Helpful tool for helping you cope with the stress. The flavor of this tea is cinnamon, very light so you can easily double this as well.
    3. Cup of Calm– This one is my absolute favorite option for stress. I know there is already a tea labeled Stress Ease but Cup of Calm has what my mind and body really like to release stress. So as with anything, your body may have different needs than mine so play around with it a bit.
    4. Peppermint Tea– I do not double this tea, the flavor is already pretty intense. This is great for the digestive issues people with Fibromyalgia have as well and a great tea to help calm you during an emotional or stressful day.
    5. Ginger- Talk about digestive help! This tea is amazing, like the peppermint I do not double the amount of tea bags when brewing this tea. If I doubled the bags with this tea it would be too spicy for me to drink. When I am having a mother load of digestive problems this is the amazing wonder tea. I usually have to brew two cups, the first one usually helps greatly. The second cup finishes the job and takes care of any pain or discomfort I was feeling.
    6. Nighty Night– I love this one to help me get to sleep at night it also has a very smooth and yummy flavor.

I love using natural products that I know will not make my side-effects from any of my medical conditions any worse. Why take something full of additional side-effect causing ingredients? Especially when something that is nice and relaxing will do the job. With that all being said about tea I would like to share my morning cup of tea with you. May your day be full of sunshine and rainbows.

Looking for other options?

I also make whipped coconut oil. For some reason unknown to me the whipped coconut oil takes away the nerve pain in my legs. Maybe it is the massage I give while rubbing the coconut oil onto my skin or maybe it is the coconut oil itself. Whatever the reason or why I do not care because it works and that is all that matters to me at this time. On the plus side, you then end up with very silky legs and who doesn’t love that. Especially on clean sheet night.

As I have read some research on how to live with Fibromyalgia I found out chemicals can bring on some side-effects. So in order to not add to any pain, exhaustion or brain fog, I clean with natural ingredients. I use baking soda, borax, vinegar (both white and apple kinds of vinegar) and an all natural dish soap.

In addition, all of my bath and beauty products are all natural, non-GMO, Organic when possible and gluten-free. I look for other great things for the products to either be made of or not made of. As well as I will look for non-animal testing and earth-friendly. The first four things I listed are the most important to me though.

Oh, the HORROR!

Did anyone say EXERCISE?!! Yes, that is right, movement makes Fibro better for us. Unlike most TV trainers show you your exercise does not need to be strenuous. Who couldn’t use a great walk outside with the shining sun and birds chirping?

For some the word exercise is a dirty word, so let’s call it movement. Because of all my movement that is required of a body when you are moving boxes, my Fibro never showed up during our move. I am talking about everything, nerve pain (besides the pinched nerve), exhaustion, muscle pain or brain fog. Nothing happened to me until I quit moving and that was only exhaustion. Who isn’t tired after moving heavy boxes for days on end?

So just move and you will feel better something nice and easy is all it has to be, nothing more. You should also be able to graduate into more movement options than walking, eventually. I am able to jog and lift heavy weights with low reps. That took me a couple of years to accomplish that so be kind to yourself when trying to accomplish a new movement goal.

Another option most will not want to try

Lifestyle. I know many people do not want to change how they celebrate things or eat or how often they participate in movement. There is research out there, where Fibro is concerned, alcohol actually inflames us and makes Fibro side-effects worse. If you could have less pain, brain fog, and exhaustion why wouldn’t you consider taking alcohol out of your lifestyle? I know many won’t or can’t do that but being alcohol free will help you with everything Fibromyalgia related.

Did anyone say food? Yes, food plays a part in how our body functions. Most Americans eat to excite their taste buds, not their soul. If after you eat something and you do not want to lift yourself out of your chair because movement feels prohibited then you have just fed your taste buds not you. I have found that with the right food you can feel amazing inside and out. Your positivity level actually changes when you find the right food for you. Happiness, energy, kindness, and enjoyment will be with you all day long without you even having to try. And what about pain-free, would you like to be pain-free too? Yes, food effects us.

I am Vegan while I know others are happy with the RAW diet and other I know use the Keto diet. Each body is different. Find your true positivity.


When you have multiple diagnosis


Multiple diagnosis = Multiple side effects

Having multiple diagnosis you never know exactly what is causing you to have a side effect.

I have been diagnosed with, Fibromyalgia, Chronic Sleep Deprivation, Vitamin D deficiency, Anemia, hyper-joint mobility, hypothyroidism, Hashimoto’s Disease and I know I am forgetting one other diagnosis.

But that is my brain lately. I am unable to remember some faces, no matter how long I have known them. Asking people “Who are you?” every time you see them can get embarrassing. I just tell them, I’m sorry ever since my diagnosis of Fibromyalgia I have a problem remembering faces.

My current problem

I am having a lot more forgetfulness lately. I cannot remember where I park a car. Unless I park in the same row every time I go anywhere. Which is not always a possibility.

This morning I used the more expensive gas to fill up my car. I have no idea what I was thinking. I do not remember really reading the option buttons. I just pushed one and filled it up. Thank goodness I didn’t use diesel gas by mistake.

Anyone I am talking to, I might as well just say “Hey you.”. I will run through a whole list of names verbally. Even though I am thinking about that persons name I will say someone else’s name.

Which medical problem is that?

Since I have several medical problems that can cause confusion or also known as brain fog. I have no idea which medical problem may need to be tweaked so I can think again. Sometimes I wonder how in the world I write this blog. But I do and some people like it enough to subscribe to it.

I am excited that I am starting to get subscribers. It does make you wonder though, if I can write this well with a fogged brain, how well could I write with a fully functioning non-fogged brain?

Sometimes I get so fogged out that I feel like my brain is a science experiment. As if a scientist has messed with it to much and now they need to allow it to heal.

I just zone out on who knows what. You are supposed to be there for your family but your brain says “out of order”.

Which diagnosis is that?

My diagnosis that can cause this issue of brain fog are:

Fibromyalgia, of course that is a big one. And for this diagnosis there is very little we can do. Relax, distress, rest, sit in silence

Anemia, iron and rest.

Hypothyroidism, take the medication prescribed but I do not. Remember I am not a healthcare professional so I am NOT telling you to stop taking medication. When I was on the medication for hypothyroidism my hair was falling out, I had brain fog more consistently, I was taking four hour naps everyday, sex life was horrible, dry skin. I got off the medication and that all changed.

Hashimoto’s disease is the auto immune disease for Hypothyroidism so I do the same things for these two diagnosis.

Vitamin D deficiency, relax in the sun for a couple minutes everyday and a nutritious diet.

Chronic Sleep Deprivation, sleep is how I take care of that one.

This one or that one?

However, if you have no idea which medical problem is causing the side effect it can feel impossible to take care of yourself. When you are suffering from brain fog you are also unable to remember everything that might help. Even if you write it all down in your medical journal you may completely forget about that helpful journal.

And when you add kids or visiting extended family into the mix your brain has an even harder time at functioning.

I wish I could function better but until that day comes I will be thankful for living today. Make sure to journal your horrible and fantastic days alike. I love this journal because it has a nice bright color and the engraving of the flower. The amazing title of the journal was the first thing that caught my eye,   “All Things Are Possible” journal. We need to remember that, all things are possible even when we feel like this pain or exhaustion will never end.

Make sure to add the things that help you so maybe this magical journal can help you on your bad days.

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Why I stopped taking prescriptions


Why did I get rid of the prescriptions?

I decided to stop using the muscle relaxers, pain killers and sleep medications when I figured out what was in them. The painkiller I took was Vicodin. I did not know it was a narcotic when I started taking it. When a doctor gives you something you think it is going to be good for you. Never did I think to question the doctor. So after about a year of taking this drug I started hearing things about it and thought, that does not sound like something I want. So I looked up what it contained.

Once I found out what was in the medication I was not happy. At the time I was raising three children ages, one-year-old, three-years-old and an eight-year-old. Plus my eldest has special needs, my hands were very full. Help was needed, not something that could make me worse. I had told my doctor I was feeling drugged. When I felt drugged I was unable to be the mother my kids needed. I already did not take it on days I had to drive anywhere. So stopping the medication seemed like the best thing to do for me and my family.

Keeping records

Before I talked to my husband about my thoughts I kept a journal on how often and why I was taking the medication. I also recorded the days I was in a lot of pain but did not take the medication because I had to drive. I was noticing when I took a week off from the medication I was able to have more days with less Fibromyalgia side effects.

Once I saw the pattern of less Fibromyalgia side effects when I did not take the medication, I decided to talk to my husband. I talked to him one night about why I thought the pain killers were not in my best interest to take. Also I told him about my journal and the findings. And I told him I would need his help with the house and the kids while I found a natural way to deal with my pain.

Another worry

As I was reading more into the details of what long term use of these drugs could do to me I became worried about something else. I was worried about organ transplants and being there to see my babies grow up. When I was first given these medications I was just 30-years-old. The women in my family, on both sides live well into their 90’s. I had to many years to possibly plan for and I wanted to be in the best health I could be. I shared this worry with my husband as well. He understood my concern and supported my decision to also stop taking the medication for muscle relaxation.

The after effect

When you change you see the lightWhile going through the detox from no longer taking the medication for pain and muscle relaxation I did go through more pain. I went through extra pain for six weeks. After that very painful period of time I was starting to have a little less Fibro Fog.

I started exercising at night a few times a week as well. I started exercising at night because that was the only time I had available to do something for myself. Before I developed Fibromyalgia I loved exercise. So it was nice to start doing something I enjoyed so much. Through my exercise journal I realized the exercise also helped my Fibro pains as well as my ability to sleep better. I tried the harder workouts because in America you either go big or go home, right? But with Fibro that was soon to be seen as not a proper option.

My favorite exercise on a Fibro day

My best friend in my home gym is my treadmill. I love my treadmill very much and have no idea how I would get through Fibromyalgia without it. I get to get a workout in whenever my schedule allows. And as anyone with Fibro knows, a nice easy workout is best, especially when we are already in pain. So what in the world is easier than walking. Even on a bad day I can go out for a gentle walk. The first five minutes may include the worst pain I think I have ever felt but I swear just wait for that sixth minute. On the sixth minute I start to feel every pain slowly go away and your mood swing leaves, plus what Fibro Fog. If I am at my worst nothing beats an easy walk.

I know most of us think easy or gentle and we turn to Yoga. I know I did and so far this is my favorite Yoga video. The first video is my favorite one and it has a great combination of relaxation, gentle stretching and movement. My Fibro does not like it when I hold a yoga pose to long. My body decides to develop muscle cramps everywhere.

What exercise routine makes you happy?

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What is Fibromyalgia

What it feels like to have fibromyalgia


What is Fibromyalgia? That is a question that when searched on the internet is improperly answered on most websites. So today I went in search of a credible website that gave a proper answer. Because most websites are very misleading when giving an accurate account of Fibromyalgia symptoms. All that is barely discussed is the pain we go through. They say we have widespread pain and joint pain. The side effects of Fibromyalgia are much more than just pain. Although I am sure anyone with Fibromyalgia would say the pain is more than enough to deal with.

Most websites I have ever come across leave out very important side effects. So if a spouse or someone who is undiagnosed went in search of answers they would be improperly informed. Most websites leave out the mood changes, lack of energy, sleep deprivation, and fibro fog or brain fog among others. These are very important side effects that inflict those with Fibromyalgia on a daily or almost daily basis. They also affect the loved ones who are searching for answers. Everyone with this medical condition suffers differently. The severity of the side effects and how much certain side effects affect us can also be different for each person dealing with this.

What is FIbromyalgia?So what is Fibromyalgia?

I have found a great website for explaining things, the Arthritis Foundation.  Since their explanation is so great I will leave it to them. They explain what it is, what you can do to take care of it, prescriptions offered and also why prescriptions are not a cure. I agree very much with everything I read from their website. I believe they have put an explanation of our condition together very nicely.

My own experience

Through my own research, I have found a couple of things that really help me. They are things that most people say they at either unwilling to do or can’t do for one reason or another. I find when someone is ready to get better they will try anything they have to. Until they are ready they cannot be pushed into anything.

Some things I treat my Fibro with

My favorite ways to treat my fibro is through exercise and nutrition. I am not talking about extreme fitness. For some reason in America, we believe more difficult or extreme the better. But that is not the case at all. A walk can be more than enough. Lifting light weights and moving the body part that is in pain for a period of time is a great option.

If I wake up in the middle of the night I will roll out my exercise mat and pick up the heaviest weights I have in my room. I then lay the weights on each side of me and I lay myself down. Then I will do chest work first because lifting the heavyweight will usually get me ready to sleep faster. If I am still awake after I have finished my chest workout I will grab a resistance band, put it around my calf and do leg exercises I can do while laying down. This is just an example of what I do. Not everything I do for my fibro is listed.

With my nutrition, I first started with supplements. I am not a healthcare professional so I turned to a book. I was raised with natural care and as I started raising my own family I decided on natural care too. Because whichever creator you believe in we were created naturally so why are we treating ourselves with man-made drugs? Regulated or not we do not need the drugs to live with Fibro. There are actual studies that say the pain-killers make our pain worse. I turned to the pain-killers for my first year of diagnosed Fibromyalgia too. So I know how people who use them feel, you want the pain gone, you just want to not feel for a while. Pain is exhausting, it changes your mood and who in the world wants to be in pain anyway??

I hope this helps.

After the supplements, I started on changing my food. This is the book I started my natural journey with.

I hope this post has helped you with the link to the Arthritis Foundations, What is Fibromyalgia. If you decide to try the natural way of healing I hope you can find things in the book I suggested to help you make your life better.

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